2 bagels in my tummy and my herpes on my mind
I had it in my eyebrows, my bangs, under one eye, and across both cheeks. Congratulations on the successful and elusive warpaint cumshot.
Just saw 30+ dicks. Explain later.
You refused to come over and kept yelling that you were gonna sleep on a car
ugh i can't even wear this perfume anymore. it just brings back blurry memories of blowjobs and regret.
It's never too late to be topless.
That's just a really flattering way of saying, "Yes, you're useless, but you have great tits."
I can dream in two languages, but it's still about ripping a bong.
Strange request but for my birthday you should get me one of those vibrators that you can plug into your iPod that go along with the music.
My ninety day supply of adderal just came in the mail and I literally just dumped all 180 pills into my hands and laughed like a maniac. Shits about to get cray
My one night stand said I love you, opened my fridge, stole my cream cheese and left.
He blacked out and wouldnt drink anything unless he funneled it, so I made him funnel water
I need to you to send me drugs via FedEx
Wanna meet at the diner for breakfast? all I've eaten in the past 24 hours is glitter and penis. starvingg.
Text me some of your sweat
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