Alarm just got pulled in my exam
Swear it wasn't me
i keep myself tagged when other girls look bad/ugly so i look better
guy in the car over is getting some terrible road head. he just gave me a thumbs down when he noticed i was watching.
Just hungoverly hit my funny bone with a hot straightener. Triple threat.
nothing like a tattoo of a large eagle attacking a small eagle whos attacking a shark to bond to siblings together for life
When did it seem like a good idea to do pull ups off the balcony? After beer 5 or shot 7?
I decided they need a food cart that just roams around the library like the cotton candy people at the circus. But with real food. like tacos cause it sounds delicious.
I was just asked if I wanted to struggle snuggle. She's a keeper
Well I never thought in the future I'd be able to say "hey remember that Easter I made porn?"
i just hope we're both dead or in prison at the same time
why do i have a pole dance champion shot glass?
I want your attention. I want your attention in the form of your penis inside my vagina.
Have you ever wondered if we are just made up characters in someone's head? You'll have to forgive me right now I think I have 7 thumbs
Fuck my life he IS a stripper, Ive been sleeping with a stripper named Phoenix. damnit, I knew the sex was too good
A guy at my table is reading a magazine called "Cheese Connoisseur"
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