Weird question, would you want to do fetish porn? you get paid.
If you ever get the opportunity, make fun of how small his dick is for me
Convinced the domino's pizza delivery person to go to shaws and buy me a bottle of wild turkey. For america.
Dude, the chicks a procotolgy intern. Don't cheat on her. She knows where it hurts the most.
you are not my drinking buddy, you are my drinking enemy.
shes making a cheerios necklace using dental floss 'just in case' she gets the munchies later
There should be an open time period where you show each other your goods and it's totally socially acceptable to bail.
I wholeheartedly concur
We're going to work out tomorrow I guess but it usually consists of doing weights for 10 minutes, then saying fuck cardio and going to Taco Tuesday
That unicorn pillow pet really made sleeping with my head in the toilet a little better.
The guy at the rodeo just told me "if ya don't say none, ya don't get none". What the hell does that mean?
Im pretty sure you just got hit on by a gay cowboy.....
You just get me....like our souls are boning in the spirit world
WHAT HAS MY LIFE COME TO I'M MAKING A SCARF FOR A PENIS
I tried to face swap with Chuck Norris. His face was too powerful... it broke my snap chat.
WHY are you masturbating to hockey fights?
It's sunday night and I just went to the store to buy cookie dough and condoms, I'm so proud of myself.
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