none of my boyfriends are responding right now, I thought I had enough to avoid this problem
Glitter + Penis = Best. Idea. Ever.
well you can't waste a boner
Banged a lazy eyed chick last night. It was like fucking an iguana.
The worst part of it is that he's not the first man I've fucked with 2+ chihuahua's.
I made him hve sex with me in the elevator so that I could put my finger down in never have I ever.
Chugged a beer while being walked to the bathroom by campus police to pour the beers out.
I let him do a line off my nipple in exchange for his prescription pain pills. I feel like 3/4 Vegas stripper, 1/4 underbelly of society.
Why do you hate her?
She's dating the best penis that has ever entered my vagina.....
I lost my bar virginty and made out with a dwarf. It was a good night
My legs feel like baby dolphins
I feel like I may be the only person who can say they crutched their walk of shame. past the secret service.
I wish there were more things in this world as wonderful as string cheese
Surriously
It's like a donut of clothes around a pair of heels. Like they were transported to another dimension naked.
It’s a 10 inch dick! Of course I’m getting a Brazilian
Randomize
