a queef is a wish your heart makes.
If you weren't supposed to have sex with your ex then they wouldn't rhyme.
THAT stays in the CAR. And if one fucking person who was NOT in the car brings it up, I will KILL you. Thank you.
..So we should take it off Youtube?
you're acting like its my fault you're allergic to sperm or something.
i told you we never speak of that again
oh dont worry, my liver will give out way before i get skin cancer
I don't know how I feel about the stuff we got from that guy. Me and Monty are driving through town listening to static at full blast...
She wants to practice her harmonica skills on my penis
Just walk up to him nice, spread your legs like smooth peanut butter on toast and scream "LOOK AT MY BEAVER! LOOK AT IT!!"
Was she always missing a tooth or am I just now noticing it?
Want to run by the liquor store later? Tequila Youn should really be in attendance at Party Mountain. No one else could be our spirit animal.
DRAW HIM A PICTURE OF SOME FUCING AWESOME THING. LIKE A UNICORN OR SOME SHIT. FANTASTIC.
Well he was saying something about being emotionally unavailable since his dad died, but then I blew him in a tree and he shut up
Why would you trust me with ANYTHING!!!???
So, Kevin dropping me off at urgent care. Seems my tampon slipped out of reach. Even after he tried to get it out with some kitchen tongs.
the party picked up after I got pretty drunk...I got kicked in the fucking head by a tiny lesbian...she was 5'1" I did not think she could do it...i was very wrong
Randomize