It was as awful as eating cow testicles on fear factor and not winning and realizing you ate balls for nothing.
in hindsight, drinking 2 bottles of wine probably wasnt going to put me in an optimal position for a job interview
on the list of things id be doing when i was almost 30, waiting for a girl to finish shitting the bed wasn't on there.
I need you to help me convince Steph that she will like Tequila if she would chase it with A-1
He just got dropped off drinking a flask, sitting on the handlebars of a chinese delivery man's bike
Tonight's gonna be epic. Did he bring my noodles?
Well it's official... The first guy I ever gave head to now holds 2 world records. Should I text him asking if I can try and break my record?
I owe a guy a shoe because I threw it over a fence. That is all.
Why do I even exist?
Do u feel more socially accepted since someone else made up their girlfriend too?
I think Saturday night will always be a mystery to me, except for buying an excessive amount of birthday shots for everyone and yelling BIRTHDAY SHOTS before every shot.
He asked if I could ever take him seriously, I told him I just like his doggy style.....needless to say I snuck out after an awkward cuddle session... I wont be calling him at 2 am anymore.
HELP! I GOT DRUNK IN THE LIVING ROOM AND CANT GET UP UPSTAIRS
When dressing for a 3way, how do I convey to the other chick I care enough to look pretty but not so much that it's a huge deal?
he sent me a green and gold dick pic and advised me I needed to come drive the snake from Ireland.
yeah but really his dick tasted like soap. like i was blowing a bar of soap
I'm not gonna lie. I need sex like plants need water right now. I just need the dick.
Randomize
