considering i was high when my dad made me pee in the cup i might fail this one
I just found out I was conceived in a rehab facility... that's better than finding out your dad could be someone else right?
She said she didn't want me watching her give me a bj, so she proceeded to make a "blowjob igloo" out of blankets...
He bought me dinner. He gave me his jacket when I was cold. And then ate me out in the passenger sear of the car.
Don't worry that pussy is fresh, I'd brush my teeth with it.
just walked past the recycling bin in class, there's keystone cans in it. go cougs.
Trust me man, I did not put any cookies down your pants when you slept.
i want us to warm up up with us making out while i lay you down touching and feeling all the spots you know are going to get you warmed up. im gonna move down your body kissing every inch as i move down past your panty line ;)
Did you watch the carolina game tonight?
I told him if he wanted to lose weight he had to learn self control. Less than ten minutes after that I ate a cookie off the floor...
Best orgasm I ever had! I though we totally connected and I asked him to stay over. He went back to the sigma chi house and returned with his blankie and a 40. please help
He showed up riding a bike blasting the ghostbusters theme song. His name was Lasercat. Im in love.
Because sadly the idea of me having a girlfriend is crazy enough to be an April fools prank
He poured champagne on my pussy while he ate me out. I found my unicorn.
I literally forgot every French word I knew and blurted out “mange moi” so he went down on me like I was some baguette fresh outta the oven!!!! I passed out.
she wouldnt leave because they were playing One Direction. I'm dating a thirteen year old.
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