hell yes lets make some ravioli
Sitting at a red light. Windows are down. I'm blasting Gaga's "Disco Stick" and doing an interpretive dance to it because I think I'm hilarious. Look to the left and see two Phi Delts that I know with their windows down. They are horrified. I am probably going to lose their Facebook friendships.
I'm so high, I forgot to harvest my farmville crops....noooooooo.
Worst stoner tragedy.
you told me heaven would be the 3 of us at Moe's forever and every hot girl that walked in would ask us to play stone face
just spent the last 4 hours searching ex-girlfriend porn to make sure there are no photos of me
Just desperately used the "it's a boy" cigar I saved from my\nnephews birth to roll a blunt
Made a visit to my old puking stall. I missed it.
It says a lot about how well I know you when I can understand messages of yours that say things like "sauteed Jesus."
We sang "Whole New World" in harmony and he spun me around. You may now barf from the cuteness.
I'm pretty sure this city writes new vice laws specifically because of us.
Stripper with the black hair and lip rings is still asleep. Found out she wasn't lying when she said she was a squirter, it was like splash mountain.
PS- My flight is being emergency landed bc someone smuggled cats on the plane.
I don't care that he's really strong. I need him to make me cum not fix my back problems
I just told my mormon professor that I was late because I was getting a STD test... good start to the day.
I think my time would be better spent seducing the TA then trying to save this paper.
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