He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
she was bad bro. like...id rather put my dick in a blender. twice.
I think a homeless person took a bath in my mouth while I was sleeping :(
Question. If Kwik Trip and Kum and Go were to merge, what would they call it? Kwik Kum or Kum Kwik?
Bisexual people are plain selfish.
Apparently I also called my credit card company to demand a credit limit increase. I'm so content with not drinking another 60 days
I whispered "you're doing a great Job" when he was fucking me. Then high fived him.
Will it make you feel better if we wear the title of dysfunctional fucking roommates? It requires monogamy unless we want to bang someone together.
Saying you need a hooker then asking me to have sex is NOT the way to get laid. Booty call 101.
You just said you hate yourself then sent me a picture of your friend's penis. Clearly this is a night of honesty.
I remember being like "I can't hold both of you guy's hair back!" so I put headbands on each of you
He's a douche. But I like the way he chokes me.
He ate me out while I was playing bejeweled. It was the greatest moment of my life.
how does that bad decision feel?
The cat hopped on my bed and watched me masturbate naked with a vibrator. I've never felt more sorry in my entire life
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