She was walking with the authority that 2 beers gave to a light weight.
took shots out of a medicine cup. i can get used to college.
she then came into the room and yelled I'M GOING TO BE A COCK BLOCK for 5 minutes
Just gave my manager part of my viccodin stash-my job is basically secured forever.
at one point he was caressing me in the kitchen asking me my name over and over again and then asking what my favorite continent was
the night ended with taco bell and tears
Is it bad that I see a party full of girls I know he has fucked as a challenge for me to be the one who ends up in his bed?
it would be a downgrade if your vagina tasted like skittles
We were having an argument with his friends mom about whether it was worse that he bootycalled me at 4 a.m. or that I bootycalled him at 12 in the afternoon
What is this nonsense on the table
Your idea.
I mean the hole taco that was chewed up and spit out
He came to my Harry Potter marathon wearing a Hogwarts uniform. Of course I fucked him.
I'm gonna eat more dunkaroos to cope with what's in my vagina.
I'm here. Help me get the salsa and bong inside.
He told me he loved me and I told him I shit myself
He was talking about his friends deceased ferret and I still managed to orgasm.
Now THAT is dedication!
Randomize
