I don't understand why she insists on me walking her to the door. She came over for literally 8 minutes, we had sex, and now I need her to leave. That fake chivalry will change nothing about the situation.
just so you know, the whole club saw your tits last night. and booed.
Moved my bed either I'm a whore or every guy I have ever slept with hid condom wrappers under my bed
once my pubes got caught on her snaggletooth it was all downhill from there
Sarah Palin is going to have a show on the discovery channel...Can I get a moment of silence for knowledge?
I thought about farting is his face when he was going down on me last nite.
I woke up this morning peeing out bubbles . I smell like baby wash . What the hell happened .
I can't wait for the day Google doesn't remind me that I got arrested for having 3 shots called 'frog cum' lined up in front of me.
you were like "guys ... i think i got fingered while dancing tonight"
our poor poor cab driver
No. You're getting a Viking funeral and I'm pawning your shit.
I don't think I used nearly enough fucks in my reply to convey the level of fuck him.
You added his wife on Facebook?! You're horrible at this mistress thing
Gotta love college... Pregamed for my 8:30 flight home this morning and gave the flight attendants all high fives when I got on the plane. Best ride of my life.
I don't care how many things you caught on fire, it's still not as bad as doing coke and then filming yourself having sex.
Sorry I steam cleaned at 1:30 in the morning and that i'm such a drunk dumb child. On the bright side, my carpet has ever looked better.
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