Boner jamz table deep. plus bar deep. wiing waing.
Thats my favorite, when ex girlfriends become XL ex girlfriends
Whoa. I woke up to 10 new text messages. All about bacon.
Met the five year old's gym teacher for next year. He is an old drinking buddy and I used to fuck his older brother. It was like a walk of shame 20 years late.
all nice guys are gay and all hot ones are assholes
You're fat. Stop making excuses
Bank of America: Available balance is $546.25 on 03/04/2011 for account 8428. Go online for details. TextSTOPtoStop/TextHELPforHelp
i loe djcudia fjxos rue.
Thanks for putting pants on me last night. And for calling me a princess.
I think the main reason you were throwing up so much was the quart of soap you chugged trying to burp bubbles. you came close
SEXX, SEXX, SEXX,SEXX,SEX SEX SEXXXXXXX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEXSEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEX.\nimagine that to the can can song. also come to my house. theres a dance routine.
Don't get me wrong, the sex itself is amazing, but I don't think I will EVER get used to her habit of singing lines Jesus christ super star when she is about to cum.
Just took a piss in some random bushes in a traffic jam and had to sprint back to the car. I'm a boss.
dad is drunk and texting us pictures of bread
I did a trust fall off the bar and then almost got into a knife fight over a push up competition. Just another Tuesday.
So I was laying on the couch reading a book and he texted me. All I saw was the image of him spitting on my vagina last night in the moonlight. I gagged.
There will be plenty of opportunity for me to sexualize Mike via VenMo.
Randomize
