margs and chips and queso make the world go round
well and inertia
Anything crazier than usual happen? I woke up in a stairway with my cock out.
my mom just used "raw dog" in a sentence correctly, time to move out.
Please tell me you're throwing the cats into this foot of snow.
This is ridiculous. It's like playing possible STD Clue, and I don't want to be the winner.
She just looked at him and said "I'm gonna fuck that" and it totally worked.
i think my love is proven by the fact that i still want to have sex with you after this conversation
She literally just cut half her hair off because she's tired of asking someone to hold it back when shes drunk and puking.
She kept grabbing my head and told my faces to stop shaking.. Also, she kept whispering something about seeing flowers in my eyes.
Welcome to drunk texts. Live from Margaritaville, it's Saturday night!!!
we were both freshly single and using each other as rebounds. most intense sex I've ever had. i felt like a grizzly bear emerging from hibernation in a whirlwind of sexual fury
when in doubt, mount your coworker in the staff room.
his mom called during sex and he made me talk to her I think we're getting serious
I think the moment she woke up butt naked on a mattress with her phone still on her face was the point she knew last night was fucked up
My dad is sitting where you rode me
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