I skipped work to stalk him.
Everything we own is covered in grass and KY
just saw the guy i hooked up with last nights' face on a billboard. win.
I have decided today is drunk costume day. That is, i woke up still drunk and found costumes all over my floor. Heck yes. This is happening. Come over. Drink.
Why are all the dvds taped to the fish tank. Really.
It's 4th of July all over again, we were chasing with the pool water.
I look at sleeping with him as a way to get up in the world. He will lead me on to bigger and better penises.
Just saying goodbye until I figure this whole "warrant out for my arrest" thing
Tim john just told us the story about him losing his virginity at 14 during church on the emergency exit staircase. This is day drinking?
Update. He just picked me up and tried to demonstrate
You are going to be so proud of me, I'm wearing underwear AND tights. That's two layers more than usual between my vagina and the world.
Is that a tongue signal to get over there? That's how my two heads are taking it.
It was my little brother's 14th birthday today. Didn't know what to get him so I just showed him how to use incognito tabs on google chrome.
So that advice that humming stops you from puking? Yeah no, just puked through my nose.
He may be 6' 6" but I'm 180 lbs of pure rage and determination
How in the fuck did you get LIVE MOTHER FUCKING BATS!?!?! Into my ROOM last night????
Randomize
