She's a black belt cougar in the 6th degree.
you'd think with how big her nose is she'd have a better smelling pussy..
she had a my little ponys comforter. i left when she went to the bathroom
Sarah Palin just got hired for Fox News. Watch out Jersey Shore... there's a new drinking game in town
i've never heard her scream louder than when the koreans scored. what am i lacking in bed?
He woke up next to me, said I "wasn't naked enough" and fell back asleep. I proceeded to blow him.
throwing up turkey will be a nice break from throwing up ramen
theres a note on the fridge that says "guess what i peed in" and a half-full bottle of apple juice front and center. why did you let him in the house?
The stoned girl at the dining hall just handed me a single chicken wing and insisted that she's "unable to procure more rations"
You Just stopped dancing, looked at me and said "I'm gonna make it rain" Then shook the open box of crunch berries everywhere.
I'M SO LONELY THAT I TEXTED THE FRESHMAN
Packing a mid day bowl in the Sonic parking lot. Have I gone too stoner?
Sorry you felt insulted last night let me rub your butt in remorse
Of all the kinds of relationships I've had in my life, I'd have to say, lab-partner-with-benefits takes the fuckin cake
What. The. Fuck.
You'll have to be more specific. I do a lot of "what the fuck" kind of stuff
Randomize
