then he goes, "ok, i have to go talk to the girl i'm semi-talking to/dating and see if i'm in trouble" WHAT IS MY LIFE?!
thanks for house sitting, cat must be hiding again... everything go ok?
... about that ...
Haha she couldn't find her dress in the morning. So she left it. How do the hell do I discreetly return that to her at work. More importantly, how did she discreetly do the walk of shame??
I ate one of your animal crackers. just one. ok four. but no frosting. ok frosting.
I'm 99% sure that for 3 hours I thought you were British. We must smoke that again.
I opened my browser to a doctor page titled "serious pain under left side of ribcage". Last night must have been healthy.
Sorry about your blender, your tiolet, your weed, and your dog...
I'm eager to hear this explaination.
At least they aren't charging us for the broken diving board...
Being drunk at the hospital is better than i expected. I got to hide and play in the little kids waiting area. Btw no one is hurt
Alive...but barely. Had dinner with my parents tonight which was conveniently located near where i left my car, phone, and self respect
I've never felt so epic in my entire life as I do right now, my bare testicles staring down the ocean itself
So we reenacted men's olympic skeet shooting using roman candles and flattened beer cans. That's all
WHY IS IT FROWNED UPON THE DRESS UP IN CAT COSTUMES AND SIT OUTSIDE OF BARS WITH A BOX OF WINE I THOUGHT THIS WAS AMERICA
But I’m still curious to know... how did the homemade porno go?
We hotboxed his bathroom. going to be a good night
Hotbox went wrong - smoke sets off fire alarm. Firefighters coming
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