Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
Everytime she opens her mouth it's like a fucking terrorist attack on my life.
I think the phrase "bag of smashed assholes" describes it best
Is it bad that I voted for Scott Brown because I want to fuck him?
Nah. I did too.
For sure. We should see if we can get Mike to pay for one, and have a triple kegger... :o==& (that's future me projectile vomiting. i try to be goal oriented)
yea, there's something about a stripper whipping you with your own belt that makes you think
the number of desperate girls at the gym right now is unfair. it would be cruel not to let one blow me.
Must say, as a couple, she and I are thrilled that our pretend lesbianism has paid off.
Also, thank you for letting me cry in your lap on the bathroom floor. I can't remember if I was clothed at that point, but if I wasn't, extra thank you.
I also don't hate being called a giant sack of cheese. Is that weird?
I just saw a cat, if i ate those mushrooms 15 minutes earlier i wouldn't have made it to the bar
Im pretty sure I didnt bang him becasue I woke up at 6am to him jerking off with a fleshlight right next to me in bed ... He made himself cum and was moaning my name ... MOST AKWARD EXPIERENCE OF MY LIFE
OH MY GOD MY UBER DRIVER IS PEEING BEHIND A DUMPSTER
Still got in the car though
I would like to reiterate that I went to give lessons and ended up having a three way instead
I'm sorry you had to knock him out on your birthday. But that also means I won the bet that you'd hit someone so you owe me 40. dollars
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