finding my wedding ring encrusted in vomit this morning really just topped off last night...
he wont speak to me right now because i told him it must suck knowing he'll never be as good as edward cullen..idiot.
I saw you try to drink out of a soda machine at taco bell, don't worry about judging
Making a drinking game out of jeopardy does not mean you studied..
You face planted into a car door. And somehow didn't drop your burrito.
I literally just wiped coffee off of the corner of my mouth with my boob because my hands were full. Thought youd be proud. Good morning!
My whole family just stopped to look at me and aknowledge how fucked up I am.
I just blocked a guy on grindr for having a little dick. See? I do have standards.
Finally another gay clarinet player. They're surprisingly rare.
This morning confirmed it...there's no maybe about it. She definitely wasn't born with it. It was definitely the Maybelline.
I made out with a mom and her daughter and got a black eye, so yeah, my birthday went well
I spend so much of my life shaving my body hair off and I want nothing more than his beard in all my hairless places.
Has anyone heard from Jamie or has she actually just been having sex for 48 hours?
Why is this not the first time I’ve seen the mugshot of someone I’ve slept with
When do you think the murder is going to happen in this Lifetime movie of ours?
Randomize