She looks like Robin Williams dressed as a frog.
Is it because I queefed?
they just tried to tell me they weren't big into drugs. A) it was the 70's. B) I've seen the pictures.
I just jerked off and used a stopwatch to track my results. Pretty depressing on multiple fronts.
This adderall has me convinced I'm an Econ major.
Yeah things got weird. You ate an entire bag of hotdog buns, then tried to catch a tree on fire with a candle.
So I think his penis grew over the weekend. Is that possible or does absence make the dick grow longer?
It's okay, I climbed on the roof of the bar to get my shoe back. This may become a Saturday tradition. I'll keep you updated
I'm so high I would give anything in the world to be inside my lava lamp right now
He let him chew on his fu man chew. The man has the patience of a saint
You should have seen the pharmacists face when I paid for my inhaler refill and a box of condoms.
Have bite marks on my arm where my temporary tat was Saturday night. Did someone try to bite Captain America or something?
One of the many mysteries surrounding the weekend...
I do NOT want to date a man who has no interest in going to a kangaroo farm
Dude I love you. So much. Thank u. I'm safea. In allysi lns car. Mine towed. If u loved me ud leand me 500 in the morning. Sleep on it nd let me know.
Just FYI: if you happen to notice a liquid of some sort on my kitchen counter with an interesting color/ texture, don't taste it
Randomize
