Tell him to shut up cuz i said so. I lost my dollar shoe :(
Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
worst experience of my life. her nipples were sick. kinda like a venn diagram
So I thought I was doing pretty good and then I sneezed and prematurely ejaculated...
I just had a girl text me from knoxville "come see me. we'll go for drinks and I can make you breakfast"
how do you like your eggs?
over tits
So guy #2, the dancer, is programmed into my phone under the name H.uy. His number- 11 digits. I should have stopped drinking.
we got our roommate high for the first time. He went into his room alone and watched Malcolm in the middle for three hours
porn bloobers exist! never have i laughed so hard while jerking off!
we need to stop having unprotected sex.
ya i know. we're like the secret life of the american whores.
what did you hear about me?
that you are a very nice girl and a pleasure to be around
that was hard to say and not laugh
The cops just showed up and arrested her. It's our 2nd date. Do I have to hang out her with her 3 kids until she makes bail or can I leave?
It feels like one of my ribs evaporated.
The uber man and I sat in silence. With my underwear in my purse and my dress shoved in the pocket of the hoodie the guy gave me.
I sucked his dick by a creek, how romantic.
Fuck my life he IS a stripper, Ive been sleeping with a stripper named Phoenix. damnit, I knew the sex was too good
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