I'm not a real person
I'm sorry, everyone knows that
dude im shwasted, kabul is not the best place for this
Never let Scott cook bacon and eggs at 2am while drunk. You should have seen the flames.
Ps, did you know if you google "drunk jenga", you're the first image that shows up?
want to meet me after class and possibly get arrested for indecent exposure?
Now you know for the next time you go in the basement to wear a helmet
I'm going to try to ignore the homoerotic subtext in that last question...
Fuck you for setting me up with the guy from the Nickelback cover band
Payback for not stopping me from fucking the guy in the wookie costume
No my first time having an orgasm with you will not be on face time
Your exhaustion is probably due to your rampant sexual urges and the fact that you live the same life as a raccoon.
He threw up on my head while I was blowing him, and then I started barfing, and the kitchen floor was a mess. Believe me, he will never, ever live this down.
Lol I wish they went straight to your cock then shot out into my mouth like a cock nacho dispenser
There is a high pitched squealing noise coming from somewhere in my house. I hope it's a gas leak cause I'm over this week man.
I'm 4,715,723% sure I don't give a fuck.
She said to call her, so I called her. Her boyfriend answered and traced the fucking call. I could litterally hear him yell because it turns out he lives in 4d
Don't you live in 4c?
Randomize
