He wanted to take me out and said we could "go huntin in the woods."
Dude, I just had an awesome rave/orgy with like bunch of hot Asian chicks on a cable car. It was like being in a Gwen Stefani video, cept w/o the bad spelling
God, I love San Francisco.
it was like getting a handjob from mrs. butterworth
just shaved my legs at the gas station bathroom before going to the club. is that too ghetto?
So we walked by this chick's house and she starts yelling at her boyfriend "STOP HITTING ME WITH YOUR DICK"
frozen peaches as icecubes. vodka Sundays just got wayyyy better
the boy next to me on the plane handed me a shot glass, then a perkaset, and told me to have a good week off..hellllo spring break.
Tinkerbell just flew up to me and tickled my balls. What the fuck did we smoke?
i have at this current moment imbibed enough alcohol to float immerse or otherwise submerge a goat of respectable size. tequila
so i ran into nick. i may be more gay than anticipated
I can't base my relationships off of good dick and dogs.
My concern for you and peanut butter is the reason I am still awake.
For future reference, when he drunkenly screams "YOUR MOTHER SUCKS COCKS IN HELL," he means that he's about to throw up. Invest in a bucket.
He's got a british accent, a tounge ring, and he's wearing an eye patch... Of corse I'm fucking him
So I thought you might like to hear how I went to sams club to print some pictures and suddenly there was 20 pictures of your dick and my snatch on the screen
Randomize
