I was so drunk last night I wanted to download a Busta Rhymes album.
Is my lip ring still in your hair?
I just saw that cheerleader from u of arkansas that I hooked up with over spring break on espn. My parents would be so proud.
I feel like we had some profound moment last night, but I can't really recall much past your ass turning up the volume on the radio.
The only thing I remember is vomiting and then feeding my dog a Mcdonalds cheeseburger and telling him yolo
i have officially banned the recreational use of bayonets.
He somehow pantsed the bouncer and tipped him over before cartwheeling and skipping away? Help me find him.
Drunk girl in a bikini just tried to bite my face, it's officially spring break
Ok, so technically yes she wore a red tank top to the stoplight party. But under it was a yellow bra and green panties.
Would you still love me if my nipple fell off?
Its a good night when you make $200 and didn't have to see any balls
what happened to you last night?
I dunno man, i pissed in a urinal, sent you a picture of my vagina and woke up with 25 bar stamps on my arms.. you tell me
I assure you, it was not a Porn Hub Bee Movie parody.
Woke up next to a slice if pizza. From what i can tell I tried to plug it into my phone charger. No more blackout wednesdays for this girl.
Did I ever tell you what happened that night after he ran you over?
Randomize