Did u know that at any givin time there r 46,948,952 drunk people in the world? Were not alone
Just got kicked out of the ocean for being "unsafe".
Woo Hoo! Just saw Asian kids with rocker mullets. Tried to get a picture on my phone, but you know how those ninjas are.
He kept saying the best defense against a lion is to punch it in the throat.
I wish orgasms lasted as long as the pain from rug burn
like the penis drawn on my face is so detailed and well done, i'm not even upset about it.
woke up outside on the porch naked surrounded by beer cans with a towl around my neck. i must be in heaven cause i've never seen this place before.
I have to bobbypin his pubes for us to have sex. The other day he wanted me to braid them.
your vagina must have magic restorative powers I feel rested and powerful this morning.
You took off all your clothes to try on her fur coat and then punched me when I said you couldn't wear it to bed.
Not to mention I think lunch is a little inappropriate when our relationship is only based on Mario kart and alcohol so far...
Nobody knows who they are, but they have an ice luge so they are welcome in my book
Trust no bitch in laser tag. Not a single one.
I no longer need a flask. I need a canteen.
How much weed should I buy my mom for her birthday?
Randomize
