Courtney? Is that you? I have pictures of this very same night.
Vegas is awesome. Its like you have a kentucky accent girls automatically assume you don't have herpes.
i go for whatevers easier....i'm bisexual strictly due to the convenience factor
you can't tell me you didn't shit your pants I saw them in the trash can by the bathroom.
He brought me bullshit flowers and a bullshit apology. Even shrek did more than that for Fiona. And he's an ogre. Does this not say anything about him?
to whom it may concern. if i am dead in colleens bed it is not her fault i slept in my scarf. my dads middle name is ronald.
I misunderstood what a furry was. Come pick me up.
I really hope your new roommate never finds out we had a threesome with a bisexual British guy in his room the night before he moved in.
I was ok with it until you started yelling " just the tip!" I know she's you gf but don't backseat drive the three-way.
Amanda bynes is my spirit animal
Ran out of deodorant. Febreze on a paper towel? Kicking college's ass.
That was the night I realized I need to grow up and stop eating mushrooms with strange 40 year old men in convertibles.
I learned so much in Pittsburgh
You spent the whole night conversing with your zombie poster, so I'd say you were pretty far gone.
I am coming home with the worst sun burn of my life, two unused condoms, and an unworn slutty dress. Worst. Bachelorette. Party. Ever.
hey, so i dont know your name. but im guessing we had sex last night. seeing that you're in my phone as "had sex time thursty thursday guy"
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