I'm pretty hammered, I'll elaborate tomorrow
Just saw the homeless asian lady making a hispanic man pull her shopping cart with a harness. I love Boston.
is it sad that pink shorts and cowboy hats remind me of getting jizz in the hair?
Anddd after the worst sex of my life, he said.."do you mind taking off the condom, tying it up, and throwing it at the door?" Weird.
Also, I'm sewing my entire Halloween costume by hand. I better get laid at every single party I go to.
As a fat white girl from Texas I can honestly say that she gave fat white girls from Texas a bad name.
I dunno what he did but it both burns and feels amazing to pee
please, i've had weekends with less dignity than this.
We need to get you laid. Or i fear you might explode like a firework of sexual innuendos and unfulfilled erotic fantasies.
This means I've slept with 2 ppl that live in vans...my life is complete
Best orgasm I ever had! I though we totally connected and I asked him to stay over. He went back to the sigma chi house and returned with his blankie and a 40. please help
Well I'm in a stranger's bed.
Gotta leave to watch the Lions
Tell me why i have 60 matches in 72 hours on tinder. Can i sell my tinder account like people used to sell their myspace pages and tumblrs when they had a lot of followers? Is that a thing?
I also tried to hide a bottle of vodka in a build a bear last night so that something that happened in my life
Welp, no use in crying over spilt milk. I can't unbang her.
Randomize
