There's a man in a pair of gray footie pajamas and a paper crown watching the kids at the playground. It was easier to tell who was a pedophile before Where the Wild Things Are came out.
My body isn't even mad at me...just disappointed
Dude you have to stop using "I eat good pussy" as a pick up line
So if a 2 is a 10 on the road... do we consider college to be "on the road?" help. its urgent.
I have her designated blowjob hair tie on my wrist. It's like a key to eternal happiness
No worries. On my way home to get ski poles and wipe the sick off my face. Then it's time to get drunk in the park
Yep. How's your hangover?
It's like I fucked its sister and it's getting back at me.
I don't wanna be gay for a night.
I think it would be worth it for free alcohol.
Apparently, "please don't I have to be in court tomorrow" is not a valid excuse for a girl to abstain from giving a massive hickey.
He might not have any marketable talents, but the kid dry humps like no other.
What the matter? A girl can't play some Super Mario without being accused of being high?
Totally thought something squeezed my boob. Then I remembered I was wearing a bra. Isn't weed great?
YOU JUST GOT OUT OF THE HOSPITAL AND YOU'RE ALREADY DRINKING?!
Can I get my morals surgically removed?
never let me tell the bartender to cut me off, i basically told on myself
Randomize
