i don't know what kind of porn he watches.. but that is NOT how you do it...
we've reached the level in our friendship where i don't think he would rape me
She said "You blew my mind last night." and I said "nah, I just blew my load." and her mom heard.
Learn some fucking English or leave me alone! "Your" is for something that belongs to you, like 'your herpes'. And "you're" is a contraction for "you are", like "you're not sleeping with me".
he's a bartender at a gay strip club. maybe he can work his magic. with getting u in, not gay magic.
new years resolution: more sex, less car punching, more chipotle.
I'd give my left nut to see you
don't do that. I like the set
We're stealing the mannequin. He's my new swimming partner.
first one here with a pint of chicken lo mein, aspirin, and diet green tea ginger ale, gets a full effort bj the day after tomorrow.
We were in the hot tub...he ate the pizza pocket directly out of my mouth
Currently studying Econ, while waiting outside current booty call's residence for him to return from the strip club. This is your fault.
Are you still feeling it? I'm in the bathtub. The water doesn't work but it's okay because I'm wearing pants.
and idk now I have nine bags of lettuce in my fridge
I don’t know whether to call out sick or call in drunk
party at the soccer house. crumbs in my sexy panties. can't. put. pieces. together.
Randomize
