Thanks for the three minutes of sex tonight.
adderall flavored popcorn. yes we did it and its awesome
I know I'm all grown up when I don't have to take my pregnancy test in the store bathroom anymore.
He wants to make love to me in a sea of paint and wash my tears away with the brushes surrounding us..I've known him for 2 days.
You peed in my camelbak and said it was a reverse catheter. Not cool.
I think I died last night. I had 14 beers..well 13 1/2 if you count the one that got spilled on the baby in the elevator.
when he put a condom on for a handjob cuz he didn't want to "blow his load in the car" i started to question my choice in guys..
I'm with Tony. He said he volunteers his ball sack for waxing but you will have to wait a few weeks. It is a freshly shaved sack. I guess he thought he was gonna get lucky. Wtf?
Smooth sack
I'm gonna have sex with my clothes on and I'll know everyone there so I'll be in my comfort zone
He sent me a recycled dick pic! He could at least use one without sunlight in it, considering it's 10pm
You said you were uncomfortable with your body and then you started making whale noises
I just literally had a dance party in my closet. I've never been this blazed.
He told me that he wants to fuck me only wearing a princess tiara...How could I possibly say no to that?
If I could I'd magically teleport drugs and alcohol to you. Like a bad decision fairy.
you missed a good time last night.
you texted me at 10 telling me to come fuck you, that says enough.
Randomize
