Hey kate, how is it?
sloppy...it's emily. kate just tried to do a keg stand. they dropped her. we're leaving.
New requirements. My future husband must have a nose ring and wear headbands.
We are no longer friends.
Just violated the laws of fuck-buddyship and talked to him about my personal life. I don't like it.
Tough to be a good wingman when you puke on yourself and everyone w/in a 5 ft radius at the FIRST bar we go to so don't tell me to step my game up
They made out. Sounded like hippos drinking water
Everything smells like blood and olive oil.
We can't tell anyone we fucked because I'm still trying to get with your friend. Is she coming next weekend?
He wanted me to blow him while he did curls and looked at himself in the mirror. Not sure if gay or ego maniac.
I would just like to go ahead and accept my slut of the year award.
It's like 10 times better than an Oscar
Help everyone's hot
Men are hot women are hot non-binary people are hot aliens are hot
I witness him finger a girl behind the dj decks yet I'm still going to meet up with him. Wtf is my life
I was so drunk last night I couldn't see faces, only from the shoulders down.
im glad to be known as "the girl you had sex with on a golf course"
I don't WANT a sex disease! Especially one assigned to me by my supervisor..
Tonight’s your last chance for a danger free blowjob.
Randomize
