So I finally got the Patron washed off my boobs.
Dude, she DOES look like she'd give good head. No bottom jaw, I checked.
Take one last look at my face, because I'm drinking it off tonight.
airport. 106 proof japanese liquor. 4 little travel size containers. im proud to be smarter than the average american.
I hit a bug from across the room with my flip flop boomerang style. That awesome.
Just found out the guy that gave me herpes died. now everytime I get a flare up, it'll be like he's coming back to say hello
...She was shooting whiskey using a turkey baster...i was horrified.
Thank you, I really appreciate that. I know I couldn't participate in class tonight and I hope that doesn't affect my grade too much. So please let me know of any extra credit opportunities such as fellatio
Just had the "whores are people too" talk with Mom. Bright side it's Christmas, and I may have been drunk, I don't think she caught on.
So because I'm off tomorrow that means your dick could be in my mouth majority of that time
it wasn't a total waste of time; I mean how often do you get to play scotch pong?
.....fair enough
I'm just so full of love and alcohol
Of course he's seen my tits, I wave those things around like a trump supporter does an American flag
Idk. The bad part of me thinks it's a good idea. The bad part is also the stupid part.
We should form a club for all of us that have stabbed a sibling with a fork!
Randomize
