Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
he likes ron paul.... that's all i'm going to say....
Hashbrowns don't come out your nose as easily as you would think
I smoked weed with pregnant girl. I'm going to hell.
Throwing up while listening to pandora radio. Don't tell me my life doesn't have theme music.
he made a joke about you fucking his daughter...i think youre golden
Woke up next to my bed in a pile of skittles, sleeping on a pair of sweatpants. I can't believe the girl didn't stick around..
I'm crossing my legs while pooping. Taking a shit has never looked so proper.
I deleted his number so I had to go into my old voicemails which are saved through my gmail and search his name... Never underestimate the resourcefulness of a drunk girl on a mission for dick
Also, I guess I made friends with the guy who caught me peeing behind a bush.
How did I roll 7 times this month and survive?\nI must be some sort of ecstasy goddess
It's a beautiful day to be high as fuck
I HATE HIM SO MUCH I HOPE HE GETS IN SOME WEIRD ACCIDENT WHICH MAKES IT IMPOSSIBLE FOR HIM TO NUT
you asked if you could borrow my vagina for the night
Coffee and girl scout cookies. Breakfast of champions.
Get fucked.
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