I just got a rly sharp new razor and was shaving down there...
and?
RIP clitoris
My cousin had a baby so we have to look at it. Apparently the event is byob
You sent her a pic of your dick with 'guess what you cant have anymore' written on it with a marker.
He has a really nice penis but its like a model that wasn't built to scale
Long story short, the rash from your last birthday party told me not to go to this one.
He threw me a bud light and when I opened it he smacked it out of my hand because "Dave giveth, and Dave taketh away". WTF
I dont care how high you are "yes" is not the correct response to "what do you want from Taco Bell" Mom.
It's one of those nights that you wish to god someone would booty call you, and then realize you'll just be stuck here with your poptart...
Oh and an honorable mention for your father's porn collection. Things I'll never forget.
going on a mission to find my pants and the guy who stole my beer don't wait up
apparently while i was high i thought that putting a dinosaur temporary tattoo on my inner thigh would keep me from taking my pants off and having sex with him...
...it didn't...
I should be trashily making out with an air force cadet in the beach volleyball court by now
It's a special kind of bond when your gay brother takes pics of you topless at a frat party.
My mom is coming to visit today & it's giving me anxiety. I feel like she can see through me & into the whore I've become.
Is she talking about a testicle cuff or just a cock ring? How did you meet this girl?
Is there a big difference?
It’s about the same as the difference between a night of drunken sex with a stripper at the Bellagio and being robbed and left for dead by a crystal meth tweaker
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