i just made my mom cry by blowing spit bubbles.
She just used a turkey baster to transfer alcohol from the glass to the bottle. Just thought you should know
It's an acquired taste. Like keystone. Or caviar.
Brutal- a couple weeks back I had a 28 hr blackout and four day hangover. S'why I decided to haul it in
i just overheard someone saying that they invented the 'tequila mockingbird' last night. sorry, but i found better friends
When you put it that way it sounds like my vagina is a parking garage to be monitored by security guards
Dude, this guy showed up with a 40 and stayed for two days. I want that lack of responsibility
There is a literally infinite number of spliffs going around this table.
Delicious
I feel like I'm at a sushi bar with a spliff belt.
They sat me on college avenue with a puke bucket and people were mistakenly throwing change in it. Got me enough money take a cab back to my apartment.
Saturday morning. Went into a study room excited b/c some1 had left a paper w/ an inspirational quote: YOU ARE cApable of aChieving anything yoU waNT. Then I read the bold letters.....
doing an easter egg hunt in a liquor store right now. i feel so adult
What kind of outfit says I totes want you to take me in the airplane bathroom?
We celebrated International Women's Day by spending $700 and taking our tops off at the strip club
The boys offered to pay but we went halfs because we're feminists
Serious question, on a scale of go for it to what the fuck are you thinking, what's me going to a monk or any religious official and saying "baptize me daddy" in a serious voice?
She made me watch three musicals and then told me she was too tired for me to stay over. I think I'm being punished but I have no clue what I did.
Randomize