I totally understand Scottish logic. No underwear+skirt=great
I had to go to the front counter of the restaurant and ask for the key because I was "pretty sure my friend is passed out in the bathroom right now"
I don't know, I don't really wanna ask the question, "Mom why am I not circumcised?"
My choices this week make me realize that I need to copyright the term "cock buffet"
We have to talk through the words with friends chat so his gf won't find out
Yeah kinda weird. My grandparents are here for dinner and I'm chilling on the couch close to tripping out on pain killers. My pap asked me how works going and I prettymuch drooled on myself as an answer.
I wish we knew morse code and could knock to each other through the wall
Welp, I can cross "making out with a guy in a dress" off my bucket list...
You can achieve whatever you wish in your imagination with some help from drugs
My mother is even happier about me having a sugar daddy than I am
I'm missing my left shoe, and there's a note on my foot (in my handwriting) that says "HAHA BITCH" Any explanation for this?
did you just send me my own nude
IM BACK TOGETHER WITH MY BF AND HERE YOU ARE SUCKING DICK FROM 2009
This reminds me of the time you were crying and puking in the toilet at that party while i did shots of tequila in between blow drying your feet. miss you!
I pelvic thrusted so hard while he was eating me out that his nose started bleeding. I think it's broken. Trophy scars, right?
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