hahahahahahhahahahaha. 26, Dominican, has a funny accent, thinks I'm hot. Tots boning.
so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
Just threw up in nordstroms while shopping for moms bday with dad. He distracted workers for me. No more tequila
So I just bought underwear that says "I'm taken." Just know that when I cheat on my bf with you, that's what I'm wearing
Just interrupted a freshman tour to ask where the sexual health center is. Figured I'd just give us all what we were really looking for.
She gave me head while using a laptop on my stomach to go online. I've never seen a better feat of multitasking.
I feel like I need to get a restraining order against him but I'd probably be the one to break it.
Honestly the war on drugs is dumb and you can just sleep in my bed which is mega comfortable anytime you want. There I said it
You handed me a red solo cup filled with vodka and Bacon. You called it the salty Russian.
I'm still drunk. I put on workout clothes this morning and just puked in my bathroom. That's the same as going to the gym, right?
Note to self: Never spend $8 on a liter of rum again
I just ate your leftovers whilst watching Garfield and Friends. Thank you across the board.
Texting people and counting condoms..we have like fourteen. Goal for this week: use all of them
I got a pots and pans set and a vibrator. Merry Crisis.
I told him he had to put his dick inside of me at approx 1159 to ensure it was birthday sex. i was 19 when he entered me.. came out 20. winning.
Randomize
