I just spent the last hour reading customer reviews on amazon.com for the book "it hurts when I poop." Send help.
his internet history is a lot of porn, how to make a hovercraft and side-effects of jacking off too much
Canada: barely better than America at a sport they invented.
woke up rolled in a yoga mat listening to enya. I'm never going back to Oregon ever again.
I don't know if it was the room or her, but as soon as the pants came off, it smelt like a locker room and old man farts.
I just peeled a layer of cum off my eyelid. Don't even tell me that's not why you came over
Dude she was 62...with a boob job. And I'm proud to say I made out with that.
It was a legit night tell he threw a snowball in the bar, thats when I knew it was time to go to the next bar.
You're the only person I know who could blow literal chunks, laugh about it, then proceed to shotgun another beer. Love you champ.
If I end up in a healthy relationship because of this, I will NEVER forgive you!!!
I've decided to have sex with him one more time to make sure I don't like him
I find celibacy oppressive. Huge waste of my time and talents.
My car insurance payment showed up today, so no inflatable hot tub for now. Sorry to disappoint.
Usually it's tequila, or vodka. But today was just the devil
.......do you have the salami in bed? I'm trying to make a sandwich.
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