i just realized that we are the poor version of bethenny and jill from real housewives... and I'm jill. this is a 6.5 on the depressing scale
at least we're not in new jersey
just heard 2 nerds making fun of a girl for mispronouncing stochiometry. they followed it up by discussing the mathematical equation for getting laid. my day just became 100x better.
you only had a canadian ten, but you said it was all good cuz you would just by molson.
i can barely afford taco bell don't think a baby is in the budget
She got all mad because she said it was "unprofessional" to tell my manager to go fist herself.
hey, this is the drunk ass freshman from last night. thanks alot for helping me out last night, i'd probably be on some lawn if it wasn't for you guys! and my mom says thanks for talking to her
No more drinking with Em. She was on the ground so much she looked like she belongs in a lifealert commercial
Well at least it wasn't the first time I threw up out of a second story window
So I think before Superbowl weekend begins we should all take a look back on last year and learn from our pitfalls... AKA no touchdown shots and kitchen crying.
Shit. I'm running the whole hotel right now. The front desk girl had to run home because she left her vibrator on the counter and her brother, mom, and grandmother surprised her and are showing up to her place before she gets off work. This will end badly no matter what.
He had really great hair, but he told me he's been in a psych ward three times. I mean I know I'm a psych major, but that's too much.
just passed the gas station where we took pregnancy tests. memories.
I got propositioned to get involved with an engaged couple. I told them I didn't think my married couple would like me to see other couples...
Did I tell you guys I was bisexual last night? I just had a flashback
He took my Spanx off and still fucked me twice. I call that success.
Randomize
