He just knocked over the beer pong table... I haven't seen so much fail in one room since I watched "Mall Cop" with my grandma
I have another pimple on my ass cheek.
I'll be there in 10 minutes.
I just passed on expense account drinking, this must be the worst hangover ever.
Excused from finishing the term project because my lab partner got arrested. For the second year in a row. Public school, I love you.
everything was going well until edgar threatened to handcuff the security guard to himself.
2011 senior yearbook drinking game. we're taking a shot whenever some dumbass uses that quote about how life isn't isn't about the breaths you take, but the moments that take your breath away. also that retarded wayne gretzky one about missing shots you don't take.
I've never heard of anyone celebrating the holidays with a fuck buddies family before.
....I'll be expecting my trophy when I return.
Oh and I guess I added our cab driver on Facebook. He has "liked" every single one of my beach pictures. Kill me now.
You never know, some chick could have a weird unibrow fetish.
Yeah. I made eggs in a microwave. I think that's an accomplishment this week, MOM.
You get 5 min
Your time limits don't scare me, I'll include foreplay and redressing in that 5 min. If you wanted to challenge me you should say you got an hour, id be scared then and more creative.
Someone the age of your son tried to go home with me from the bar last night
Now I don't feel like I'm sweating cheeseburger all the time.
Tackling and headbutting friends, running away and hiding from everyone, attempting to streak across campus, and then waking up with no sign of a hangover... happy 21 to me
One of your 'guests' left her bra in the kitchen.
Dude, does it look like any of the women I bring home wear bras?
Randomize
