Do you feel that fire radiating from matt's crotch for you
Gross. gingers suck
Just did lines off a tackle box. Love Montana.
i'm too stoned to be pregnant. the kicking is morse code for wanting beef jerky.
at roughly 3:30am you called me saying you were gonna start a big game of strip twister in politics class and i was your partner.
he called me from germany to tell me about all the gummy bears he bought...i'm doubting his sobriety
Sorry I pulled the thermostat off the wall..
You kept screaming how great you were at drawing poptarts and you insisted on drawing them all over my forearm
FUCK YOU. AH. FUCK BOTH OF US MORE BOOZE.
MAS TEQUILA.
I hope it's the birth control, otherwise I'm dying
WHY WERE YOU COOKING NAKED?
WHY WERE YOU SLEEPING ON MY COUCH?
He wanted me to come over on Christmas...inviting your fuck buddy over for the holidays is just something you don't do.
i came outside and he was eating her out on my lawn. i refuse to pick up the dog shit in my yard so i hope he chose the spot wisely
Ya it was crazy the power went just as she was about orgasm and the vibrator got fried with the power surge
Great, now even dream!me is a drunken borderline mess.
Don't send me pics of cunning dicks while I'm eating potato chips
Randomize