you ever wonder how lesbians feel about girls being in relationships with other girls on facebook? could it annoy them more than it annoys me?
explain to me why "crisis hotline lolz" is in my contacts?
I'm gonna vom. In the dentist chair. Who makes a dentist appt for July fucking 5th.
It would be like bopping for an apple with my penis but never winning an actual prize. The only thing I would get from it would be the joy from taking part but then regretting it forever more
When she was dating that guy she told me If they broke up, I would receive a call and no matter what I was doing I'd have to go over a fuck her. It's like being an EMT for sex.
I feel like I've been drunk all of June. And I am in NO WAY ashamed about it.
I was galloping around pretending to give birth to pbrs. I could have used a mask.
My mom just told me my dad shaves his pubes while drunk and I don't know how to feel anymore.
I'm taking ecstasy it's gonna be that kind of Vegas trip
Your boobs stole my birthday thunder!
The problem I'm having with looking for jobs while drunk is reading is really hard
I was trying to drink every time they said planned parenthood but my body isn't cut out for this.
you have 30 seconds to convince me not to grab this guy's crotch in front of his girlfriend
Please tell me why we have been neighbors since elementary school and waited until the night before I moved to fuck.
Just confirming I will be washing my asshole at your house at approximately 2:45 tomorrow afternoon.
The strangest confirmation message ever sent.
Randomize
