i'm watching the fashion show on bravo
you're cheating on project runway?
if you can't score coke, you buy crack.
where does the pee come out of this thing
All we did was argue about ponys and drug dealers
She was telling me which girls she thought I should fuck or not at the bar. Why can't all one night stands be that cool after?
Ya, found out why there were rat traps in my bed. Guess I pissed in Sams room so he went to the store and got them and put them on my bed and put tabasco in his humidifier and put it in my room
Jameson and I invented street rugby last night. Yeah
Teflon bitches. Nothing fucking sticks to this kid, not even a kid. Maury Povitched this shit outta that situation.
It's titled "A countdown to death. A psychological look at the downward spiral of actress Lindsay Lohan and her inevitable Hollywood demise" This dissertation is genius. Not a single sober moment for either Lindsay or myself. Good stuff!
You asked the bartender if she was trying to get you drunk. She cut you off after that.
It's snowing in May and there was a law school party at the strip club. The end is near.
she basically told me that her vine videos last longer that I do
Apparently I have decided there are no repercussions for my actions
Wow two curved penises in one weekend. I feel like this may be good luck. Like finding a four leaf clover
I just fuked with kevins application and made it say that he does conjugal visits for community service
hey some people donate their time while apparently kevin donates his body
This town reeks of teen pregnancy.
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