You are still hot in my book. I wanna dry hump u like a 9th grader then hump for real when the herpes is gone.
i am fully taking advantage of taking advantage of him
:O -> O: ... that's emoticon for "he threw up in my mouth while we were making out"
I had one margarita and got the worst headache of my life... its like my liver has senior week ptsd
like a sex slave...but with a better dental insurance plan
I don't know if I want to cry scream puke or go somewhere and drink more. This is such a weird emotion.
Beer coozy in the gym. Don't judge me.
he told me "apparently my gag reflex doesn't work so if you magically grew a penis I would deep throat you"
We're not piercing ourselves today.
I was so high the sounds of a cricket drove me out of my home at 4am.... Boo that fucking cricket
and yet oddly the jello shots tasted better coming up than going down
I don't think I'm ever gonna need a boyfriend again. I have a body pillow, a vibrator, and I'm strong enough to open my own jars.
my birth father cheated on his wife with my birth mother. it's literally in my blood to be a home wrecker.
My neighbour just came round to ask why we posted a spatula through his door at 3am. What do I tell him??
Had to clear my browser history. I figured if she used the search bar and her name came up, it might be a little creepy.
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