Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
So he says "lean over this" which is a chain across the doorway, held into the wall with bolts. I do. Then he puts his weight on top of me to try and get it in.
It breaks. We fall.
I now have a broken nose, a concussion, and an infected, split lip. Why do I have the worst luck in guys?
I can practically hear my vag and my conscience fighting.
He kept singing "who's that peekin in my window" we thought he was high til we realized someone was lookin in the windows.
She gave him a lap dance on the glass table. You can guess how that ended
I just want you to sit on my face and to tell you you're pretty. Most girls would leap at this opportunity.
take 2 Ambien then drink a Red Bull and watch Alice in Wonderland. Trust me.
Im otw to class. I was at the Library. Just past three girls with a bottle of tequila playing dizzy bat.
Just slept with a female bodybuilder. not cute. but it was like fucking hulk hogan with a twat. Beastly.
im so disgusted with myself. funny thing was i lasted 15 seconds. she benches 325
Yes he was puking but in the only light of the whole parking lot and he was resting in the patch of clovers and he just was a garden fairy
Maybe you should start carrying pepper spray. You are like the Justin Bieber of lesbians.
Just ate a gummy bear I found in my sheets. So yeah, 2013 is SO gonna be my year.
I promise not to pretend to be Jesus and take the wheel. But to my credit you shouldn't be saying that while I'm that drunk and we are in a car.
She always used to joke about becoming a stripper. WHO'S FUNNY NOW?!
Dude I had sex with her and she STILL thinks I'm gay. I don't know what else to do.
Randomize
