Watching Miami Social reminded me of how much I miss snorting coke with burger king straws in a life guard hut on the beach until we noticed someone was drowning.
Did you save them?
Who?
I just saw a girl licking a cheeseburger wrapper. dont ever let me get that fat
just walk of shamed past a man riding a bike. RIDING A BIKE. what a wholesome life he must lead.
me neither. i remember bell pepper tequila but not why or yelling
Hahaha, I forgot about doing shots out of the bell pepper
the caf people were giving us weird looks and she yelled ITS A LIFE STYLE
He stumbled out of the bar bathroom at 3:30 am with his jeans unzipped and his dick hanging out - it was the physical manifestation of "blackout with your cock out"
I just watched my mom get dick on Skype.
That d should have definitely been an s.
Twist to Josh's story, he had a gyro in his hand and never dropped it even after he got knocked the fuck out
Burnt my boob on a piece of hot waffle at work today..I feel like thats a new low point in my career..
Nothing says I love you like a silicone dragon dick
There's a baby in the strip club. I say again: THERE'S A BABY IN THE STRIP CLUB
I just used an Amazon gift card from a student to order a new vibrator....teacher of the year
we've talked on the toilet we're linked now
That time of your life is like a blur to me. There was churches, car fucking, and conservatives
its Niagara falls. its like international waters. You can get away with anything there
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