using no condom is gross. my vagina has a dress code.
I thouht it was time to go to sleep and suddenly I was front row on brokeback mountain
Kay wants to put chicklets in our cooters to make beavers and take pix captioned Got Wood? Taking public transit does scary things to her.
just smash crush and snort whatever we can get our paws on
I knew I fell for you for a reason
Woke up in a different state, wearing only a bk crown. My boxers are in a tree and I think I went to the hospital last night.....
I told you not to do acid with the girl who works the late shift at 7-11
I have fifteen cents in cash and 80 cents in the bank. BUT I have weed.
She said she didn't want me watching her give me a bj, so she proceeded to make a "blowjob igloo" out of blankets...
yea, their son has been arrested on more than one occassion, their daughter is pregnant and their other daughter graduated but she was adopted, so clearly genes are everything.
Drinks appeared in front of me. Who am I to deny destiny? And by destiny, I mean free drinks, which appear by magic.
He only likes me when I'm naked and I don't like being around him clothed. It's the perfect relationship.
I mean you would really have to try to not have fun at a party that doesn't require pants....
My actions are not mine. They are the actions of Patron.
If it snows I'm making an igloo and getting wasted in it
If he would've shaved his beard when we first broke up, getting over him would've been so much simpler. That asshole.
Its like Gods punishment for wanting to party
Randomize
