Why do you proceed to call me "Queen La Queefah?"
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
my little brother just asked me why i have handcuffs. How do I tell him that his sister likes being taken advantage of in the bedroom?
Tell me you remember me getting a tampon from the girl throwing up in the next stall
His beard is glorious and he smells like barbecue. Introduce me to him.
Oh I woke up in my neighbors garage using one of their sleeping bags, as my neighbor was doing laundry in there.
Dude you ate toast sprawled out on my kitchen floor and said "this is comfy". No more day drinking.
just cuz theres a goalie doesnt mean i cant commandeer the goal and become a way better goalie
Plus now I feel weird sleeping with you. It's like shooting a three legged deer. It's already at a disadvantage and couldn't get what it's full potential deserves.
At first I was a little embarrassed for sharting, but then i realized it was a bachelor party, and I went balls to the wall
Listen you let me know what you're doing after drinking rum punch all morning
I don't know how to reply to him. 'I'm glad the ecstasy my friend tricked you into taking wore off'...? It just doesn't seem sincere
My vagina is no longer accepting new clients.
I'm to the point where I just want to get back at him in a hot man sex tornado way.
You were so drunk Last night you asked for your glasses so you could read the directions on a band aid
Randomize
