How do you say "I'm not pregnant in Spanish?"
I don't want to talk about it but I will say, that was the best two headed $68 blowjob. Ever.
Just curious... Do you still have the cocks bracelet? You know, the one we pass around to whoevers been the biggest slut recently?
you're not a real person. you're actually just like a box of wine that can talk
I HAVE A PRESENT FOR YOU AND ITS NOT MY VAGINA
that beer fried lasagna last night was sooo good
that wasnt beer fried lasagna, you just poured beer on my lasagna
at one point i was feeding a guy sour cream chips and he made me make the "choo choo" noise as they were going in. \ni feel so much closer to him now.\n
So as your former husband, I get to give you away at the wedding right?
I feel like butter and tequila would be excellent combination. Right now. Please do this in my name.
this year we will have multiple halloween identities. lesbian couple meets brian and stewie
Why did you make me get in the car with you and then not give me a ride? I woke up in a bar with a blanket on me.
I sewed up my pants, stole his girlfriends white shirt, and went to work hungover like a responsible adult.
oh so have I but I'd still suck a dick or 20 in the name of freedom.
he called me 'mate' and i had to remind him that you dont call people mate who continously make your dick hard
I just saw a woman give her infant whiskey tits. About ten minutes ago she was doing shots, and now she's breast feeding. Whiskey. Tits.
Randomize
