Well you will be happy to know that aaron carter hit on me
They use the phrase "final warning" so often the words have lost all meaning.
dude, im still at the bar with two chics... one has a moustache ill save that one for you... be home in 20min..
fighting downstairs. join me tonight to hear their makeup sex. also, let's make skittles vodka.
im using old socks as coasters. im going to make a great housewife.
I cant watch the real world now after jersey shore. its like trying to go back to vagina once uve had anal
He told me to pretend to be a shark, and he would slay me with his harpoon cock.
it only took me 1 hour to write 8 pages. i'm never doing school work without adderall ever again.
just heard a tri-delta girl talking about her drunken escapades last weekend...it's like the exact plotline to a hardcore porno.
i believe i can now do shots of gasoline with no chaser. its been that kind of summer.
I can do it, this is my punishment and I will accept it, plus id like to see the look on peoples faces when I throw up on them
I tried to interpretive dance to Candy Shop to stop the awkwardness.
I may or may not have just let Ash Ketchum capture my wild Pikachu in a parking lot.
I'm full of champagne and rage, of course I'm showing up at his house.
a guy just skateboarded past my window in a bunny suit while chased by a dog walker
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