You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
Uh i was pretty wasted sat, so if i was weird it wasnt me. It was just vodka bein weird w my phone
Tonite tequila might call you
Be prepared
Black out sex on the trampoline? yes please.
It's not mothers day until you're vomitting syrup into grandma's toilet. Cherish the holidays
we kept pushing you at the prospective students saying go for it, itll make them want to come here
you kept yelling THIS ONES FOR THE ADMISSIONS OFFICE and then youd go in for the kill
Less talking, more tequila
Nothing says I've got my life together like vomiting on the groom and passing out at your youngests sisters wedding
Im going to bed. I'm seeing 7 of everything and my world smells like gravy
I've decided he is effectively a mouth, hands and cock held together by bad ideas and compliments, and I'm OK with that.
Also, yes, I look pretty rough. But my ovaries fought back this morning so getting dressed decently was not a priority.
Would jacking off with Benadryl cream be good or bad for the poison oak on my dick?
They only searched every other person. But I sacrificed myself to get our vodka across the border
I'VE LOST MY DIGNITY, MY PRIDE, AND EVEN MY BOOTY CALL. HAPPY THANKSGIVING.
I just hooked up with the German exchange student who doesn't speak English. And you said I have no talent.
We ran out of vodka, so instead of body shots you wanted to do cupcake shots off her naked body...happy birthday to you.
Randomize
