Tears do usually get me what I want. That and oral sex.
Whatever is fine with me, as long as I am dressed in green and end up shitfaced.
He won't talk to me. He'll only communicate using scissors
Sorry I sent so many blank messages. My hands are slippery. Don't ask why.
We're about to go to a party titled 'Night of 1000 Jello Shots".
I fell asleep while we were Skyping and woke up to his balls bouncing in front of the camera while he sang "Wakey Wakey!" over and over again. Merryfuckingchristmas.
Hey, this is Travis. I just so intelligently deduced that I am in a college dorm somewhere in western oregon. Probably WOU, based on the process of elimination.
He just stared into my eyes and touched himself. That isn't hooking up.
We had sex in the bathroom. Good sex. Toilet breaking sex.
You had a hat of bras. Probably a good dozen, which is totally impressive for a Thirsty Thursday
Don't worry, I'm taking the best gay radar in the World, my sister's boobs. All guy who is not looking at them, it's fair play for us.
I just had a twenty minute discussion about endangered breed dog breeding with an Extremely drunk guy
So many questions...
Fell asleep on kitchen floor again, chicken nuggets everywhere.
You know for a guy who frequently jumps into stuff without thinking it through, your can do spirit is lacking on this one
so we’ve decided to fuck for our own health
Randomize
